Moms Work More, Kids Weigh More?

I love a good lead.  I was sitting at my desk early one morning, preparing for clients, when I received an email with the following in the subject line “I look forward to you debunking this (because I think it’s crap).” Now if I love a good lead, I love a good debate even more. I clicked through and found a story that has caused quite a commotion in the blogosphere. A study published in the Journal of Child Development found that there’s a correlation between mothers working and higher BMI for their children. Translation working mothers have heavier kids.

Patience isn’t a virtue I naturally possess and when irritated I have difficulty disguising it but my first reaction to this wasn’t anger or even surprise. I have an unusual schedule in that some days I work early and I’m home to make dinner and do homework. Other nights, I am in the office until 7:30pm. There is a distinct difference in the 2 scenarios when it comes to my children (similar ages to the children studied by the Cornell team).  On the nights I’m home, I am there to make dinner. I have time to make sure the kids start homework early enough and get to bed on time. On my late nights, it’s all a rush. Dinner (though we’re talking Applegate or Amy’s) may include a convenience item and bedtime can easily be delayed.  My children are far from obese and I’m a nutritionist but I get it.

Much of the outrage stemming from this story had to do with finger pointing. After all, children’s weight is affected by many factors: activity level, food choices, sleep, and genetics to name a few. So why “blame” mothers when this is likely a more complicated issue? This reminded me of a conversation I had when my 8 year old was a baby. I called my mother for advice, I was upset and complained, “why is everything on my shoulders? I work but still have to grocery shop and organize Louise [babysitter] and put Myles to sleep, Marc just has to go to work.” I happen to have a very helpful husband but when it came down to childcare, things weren’t even-Stephen. My mother said “you’re lucky, Marc is hands-on but there is only one Mother.” As Oprah would say, it was a “light bulb moment”.   The reason a father’s working status isn’t mentioned is because feeding children and all that goes along with it continues to be more the mother’s “job”.

With slightly over 70 percent of mothers working, the question is what to do with this statistically significant link.  Mothers need tools for timesaving meals they can perhaps make on the weekend. Additionally, perhaps kids can sign some sort of pledge limiting TV or video games when their parents are at work. And parents, mothers and fathers, need to get home whenever possible so as not to disrupt bedtime.  In my eyes it comes down to time and not neglect or guilt or blame. Anything you’d like to “debunk” in this study?What emotions does it evoke in you? Did the bulk of “feeding” responsibility fall on your mother growing up? Is that different from your current situation? Does the 70% statistic surprise you? Let the debate begin.

Double Chocolate

People often say to me, knowing that I am a nutritionist, “your kids must eat really well.” For the most part, my boys are good eaters. I find the biggest struggle with balance. I make an effort not to present healthy foods as the only foods and not to have treats off limits. Now that my children are a little older, I find they take less policing as they understand why certain foods are less healthy, at least I thought that was the case.

Our family skis most (ok pretty much all) weekends from December through March.  My sons are in a ski program. They are with the same kids and teacher each weekend and really get to know their way around the mountain. Most parents choose to put money on the kids’ lift tickets so that they can purchase snacks when they come in for breaks. Unlike ski school, the kids don’t go to a separate building with specified food. They may take a break at the summit or one of the base lodges, wherever they are they tend to come in mid-morning hungry.

I was thrilled when I found out about this debit card option. It eliminated the worry of either boy losing their money or us forgetting to give them money. Plus, the kids love what they think is a “credit card.” This was the first weekend of their program and they had a few snack questions before drop off. “Can I get candy?” I told them candy wouldn’t fill them up and maybe they should get something else like cereal. “Can we get Gatorade?” I told them it wasn’t the best drink and to stick to water or some hot chocolate (probably as sweet as Gatorade but no coloring, better ingredients).  They had a great first day skiing, chose pretzels and sun chips for snack. Given the less-than-stellar options, it was fine.

Yesterday was rough weather for skiing. It started as snow, progressed into hail then sleet and finally rain. Marc and I went inside after a few (ok 2) runs with zero visibility. Our friends told us most of the groups were upstairs and some parents were pulling kids out. We went to check on them. We located one boy, I’m purposely not telling you which one. This son was wet from the weather and diplomatically, in front of his instructor said, “I’m having fun but I can leave.” Our other son’s instructor told us the other child was downstairs getting something to eat.

I turned to head down the stairs and collided with this rosy-cheeked child of mine. His hands were full of food and drink and he had that guilty/busted look on his face all parents know.  Clutched in one hand was a bottle of water and in the other? A snickers bar AND a brownie. My initial reaction was to laugh, I did and told him to have his snack and meet us downstairs. The more I thought about it though I was a little upset. I do not pack a snack for the boys, do not expect them to choose the apple every day and know my children come by their chocolate love honestly; it’s genetic. My issue was with the volume. Choosing both the chocolate and the brownie seemed like the mouse really playing when the cat was away.

I later asked my son about his snack and he said, “it wasn’t candy or Gatorade.” Technically this was true, I didn’t make too much of it. I told him that one snack is probably sufficient and if he wants a second item try for a fruit. Of course chocolate guy’s brother chimed in “next weekend I am going to get an apple for my snack.” The truth is, all children will go to school or camp and will be left to make their food choices eventually. When I think back, I can think of snacks around the swimming pool or at canteen at camp with fond memories. My realistic hope is that some of this Foodtraining my kids have received will rub off. I hope that they will be able to strike a healthy balance for themselves where chocolate and apples can coexist.

P.S. In full disclosure, I came to these somewhat rational conclusions only after “with all I taught him he chooses this” and other thoughts were cleared.
What do you make of this episode? What were your favorite childhood snacks? Do you think most kids go overboard when parents aren’t present? And finally, snickers or brownie?

Kids' Cravings

This is a guest post from Juli Novotny, founder of Kookie Karma (yum) and  the PUREmamas blog. What started as a "baby blog" for curious friends and family members transformed into PUREmamas with the intention of giving new moms, pregnant women and modern conscious parents healthy food ideas, recipes and motivational tips.



Kids’ nutrition is my favorite topic in the world. I love to see little ones, often the pickiest of eaters, getting excited about food, but not any food. I'm talking healthy food. It's not always easy to get children to enjoy fruits and veggies so when I come up with a recipe that kids want more of, it's a huge feat for me. Just because I'm a healthy person and own a health food company doesn't mean my kids are born without a sweet tooth or food aversions. It has been challenging to find foods that are palatable and flavorful that my little boys won't spit out!  I'm lucky in that my life revolves around being creative in the kitchen. I created my PUREmamas blog, and write articles such as this, to share the results of hours of culinary experimentation with others.

Here are a few lessons I have learned first and recommendations:
Parents shape their children's habits and desires based on their own. For example, I hate when I get water in my ears. So, I assume my kids do too and always cover the up when I wash their hair. I also hate little spiders and sometimes freak out when I see one. Now, my son is grossed out by them. Food is no different. Kids will do, say and eat, as we do. We are their role models and habit formers when they are young.
If at first you don’t succeed…I guarantee you that with some effort and multiple tries, every parent can find something that grows from the Earth that your children will actually touch.

Fruit: both my sons HATE fruit, I think it's a texture thing. They won't even take a small bite of an orange, pear or strawberry. Strange, right? So I put all the fruits I want them to consume into a blender, blend it up with a little goats’ milk or a little homemade almond milk and suddenly fruit is no longer the enemy.

Greens: my sons will not touch f pasta or rice if there is just one spec of a green leaf in it. They will pull it out with their fingers no matter how well I cover it up with sauce . Crunchy kale chips  on the other hand? My kids devour the entire bag and want more.

Add healthy stuff to something they already LOVE. Or replace the junk with a little LESS junky!

1. If your child loves milk, throw it in the blender first with a little green juice or add a few drops of flax oil. Add just a little each time.

2. Kids obsessed with apple juice? Make your own at home - get out your juicer and use only organic green apples - these are less sweet.

3. If your children eats oatmeal buy plain oats add hemp oil, probiotics and fresh almond milk to them. Add your own sweetness with agave nectar, raw honey (not for children under 2 though) or pure maple syrup. Just a drop.

4. Throw out the candy. Instead of giving candy as a treat (or a bribe) - give chewable vitamins from the health food store. We have these ones that are made with xylitol and molasses and tons of greens! My son is obsessed with them and he only gets them once a day.

5. Exchange the wheat based crackers for the brown rice based. And choose those without any added sugar.

6. Do they love chocolate? Make your own chocolate milk. Or make a large batch of raw truffles and keep them in the freezer. They are easy to make.

7. Are your children suckers for cookies? Make your own healthy macaroons and store them in the fridge.

8. Soda? Don't even get me started. Throw it out. Instead add lemon or orange rind and juice and agave nectar or xylitol to bubbly water. Mix and serve.
Any questions for Juli? What are your favorite healthy food tweaks?